The Autopen Scandal. Bondi Steps in Swinging.

Leave a CommentThe Autopen Scandal. Bondi Steps in Swinging.Commentary, Corruption, Government, White House

Folks, if you thought the Biden years were a nap in the Oval Office, wait till you hear about the autopen presidency. Picture this: a machine humming away in the White House basement, scribbling Joe Biden’s name on everything from pardons to executive orders while the man himself might’ve been catching Z’s or staring at the Resolute Desk like it owed him money. It’s not science fiction; it’s the scandal that’s been percolating since the old boy stepped aside, and now it’s boiling over with Attorney General Pam Bondi stirring the pot.

For four years, the autopen – that trusty mechanical pen-arm from the Eisenhower era – was Biden’s stand-in for actual decision-making. Reports detail how it affixed his signature to hundreds of documents, including the infamous preemptive pardons for Hunter and a slew of January 6 committee folks. The claim? Biden’s cognitive slide was so pronounced that aides were running the show, using the gadget to rubber-stamp policies without his real say-so. No hand on the paper, no brain in the loop – just a facsimile of authority that smells fishier than a Delaware beach after a storm.

Cover-Up in the West Wing

The White House inner circle knew the score. Testimonies paint a picture of frantic efforts to hide Biden’s diminished capacity, with the autopen deployed as the ultimate alibi. Executive actions piled up: orders on everything from borders to bucks, all potentially illegitimate if the president wasn’t truly present. It’s like letting the butler sign your checks while you’re out cold – sure, it looks official, but try cashing one at the pearly gates.

Democrats squawk that Biden greenlit every jot and tittle, but the evidence suggests otherwise. Witnesses describe a setup where authorization was verbal at best, scribbled at worst, and the machine did the heavy lifting. This wasn’t efficiency; it was evasion, a bureaucratic sleight-of-hand to keep the illusion of a functioning commander-in-chief alive while the real power lurked behind the curtain.

Bondi Steps Up to the Plate

Enter Pam Bondi, Trump’s pick for attorney general, who’s wasted no time diving into the mess. Her team is poring over those pardons, questioning their validity under the shadow of autopen doubt. House Oversight’s fresh report – dropped just hours ago – lands squarely in her lap, demanding a full DOJ probe. Null and void, they say, for any action lacking Biden’s handwritten nod. Speaker Johnson echoes the call: every autopen scribble without proper backup should get the heave-ho, starting with those get-out-of-jail-free cards for the president’s kin and cronies.

Bondi’s review isn’t some polite audit; it’s a promise of accountability. If the pardons crumble, Hunter’s back in the hot seat, and the ripple could undo a raft of late-term decrees. Imagine the chaos: billions in spending, regulatory thickets, all teetering because the signature was as real as Biden’s golf handicap claims.

The Road Ahead: Voiding the Voidables

What’s next? DOJ gears up for the mother of all reviews, scrutinizing every executive move from Biden’s tenure. Legal eagles will debate if autopen use crosses into constitutional foul territory – Article I demands presentation to the president, not a proxy pen. Courts might get dragged in, especially if voided pardons revive old cases. Trump himself has blasted the setup, insisting Biden “knew nothing,” and with Bondi at the helm, expect subpoenas flying faster than a drone over Mar-a-Lago.

This scandal’s no partisan sideshow; it’s a gut-check for American governance. If leaders can outsource their authority to a gizmo, what’s left of the republic? The autopen era ends not with a bang, but with a mechanical whir – and hopefully, a cleanup that puts real hands back on the wheel. Stay tuned; the ink’s barely dry.