Ah, Obamacare, that gleaming monument to government genius, where the word “affordable” apparently means “affordable for everyone except the poor suckers paying the bills.” Remember when this thing was sold as a lifeline for the uninsured? Turns out it’s more like a golden parachute for insurance executives and a bottomless buffet for every grifter with a fake Social Security number and a dream.
Let’s start with the latest comedy routine straight from the federal funny farm. Some intrepid souls decided to test the system by inventing a couple dozen imaginary Americans – complete with bogus IDs, incomes pulled out of thin air, and Social Security numbers that were never issued to anyone breathing. Result? Twenty-three out of twenty-four got approved for coverage. The lucky phantoms are now sucking down more than ten thousand dollars a month in taxpayer subsidies. One batch even qualified for the special low-income deal where nobody bothers asking for proof – because why verify when you can just trust?
And these aren’t isolated giggles. The system flagged tens of thousands of subsidies going to Social Security numbers tied to people who’ve been dead longer than some TikTok trends. In just one year checked, millions paid out for the dearly departed, including cases where the stiff checked out before the “enrollment” even happened. Synthetic identities, identity theft, whatever you call it – the graveyard shift is working overtime on your dime.
Then there’s the overachievers: certain Social Security numbers racked up coverage for thousands of days across dozens of policies. One champion logged over twenty-six thousand days – that’s seventy-one years of “healthcare” on a single number. Must be the elixir of eternal youth, or more likely, the elixir of eternal fraud.
All told, more than twenty-one billion dollars in advance subsidies went out one recent year with zero evidence anybody bothered reconciling them come tax time. Just poof – gone, no questions asked. And the total tab for these “enhanced” giveaways hit one hundred twenty-four billion in 2024 alone. Duplicate enrollments? Sure, why not – millions of folks apparently signed up for multiple plans, wasting another fourteen billion annually like it’s pocket change.
The Real Patients: Insurance Company Balance Sheets
While regular Americans get stuck with denied claims and skyrocketing deductibles, the insurance giants are the only ones getting actual healing. Hundreds of billions in subsidies flow straight into their coffers every year, padding profits so handsomely their stock prices do the happy dance every time Congress threatens to open the spigot wider. The “enhanced” subsidies turned a program that was already a cash cow into a whole herd of prize bulls. No wonder they’re the picture of health.
Democrats to the Rescue: More Money, Same Holes
Now comes the punchline. These enhanced subsidies – the ones that removed income caps and turned Obamacare into a middle-class entitlement – are set to expire at the end of this year. Without them, millions of folks would see premiums double or triple overnight. Terrible, right?
So naturally, Democrats in Congress are demanding a multi-year extension, maybe three more years of the same glorious slush fund. Just pour in more billions, they say, while the fraud faucet is spraying like a broken fire hydrant. Oversight? Verification? Cracking down on the broker scams that switched hundreds of thousands of people into new plans without their knowledge? Pish posh. Details, details.
They’ve had years to fix this leaking supertanker and instead chose to keep bailing with a thimble while shouting “full steam ahead!” If they get their wish and super-size the subsidies again without plugging the gaping holes, the fraud won’t just continue – it’ll throw a party, invite all its friends, and send you the bill with a smiley face sticker.
This isn’t healthcare for ghosts, grifters, and corporate titans, all on the American taxpayer’s tab. If that’s “affordable,” then I’m the King of Siam. Time to pull the plug before the only thing left alive in this program is the waste.