Weird news: How a sexual fantasy went HILARIOUSLY wrong

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So, the only self-reliance tip I can draw from this comedy of errors is CHECK, CHECK, and CHECK your plans.

In this story from Australia, a man who was hired to storm a house armed with a machete to fulfill a stranger’s bizarre sex fantasy – but got the WRONG address – was cleared in court of all charges.

In what was described by the judge as an “unusual” case, the two men from Sydney apologized to the terrified victim and even shook his hand, before being arrested by police.

Here’s what happened.

In the early hours, a startled resident on the same street as the fantasist woke up to find two men in his bedroom, machetes pointing down, and repeatedly asked him if he was “Kevin”. He had to remove his sleep apnea mask to tell them he was not and he told the two intruders to ‘bugger off’ 

After realizing their mix up, one of the men is said to have even offered an apology to the victim, saying “sorry, mate”, before leaving the property.

After arriving at the right address, one of the men was asked to leave “the great big knife” which was in his trousers in the car.

The men then entered the property, where they drank coffee and the client made bacon, eggs and noodles before falling asleep on the couch.

An hour later, police arrived and arrested them.

Setting out his reasons for acquitting the lead plaintiff, the judge said: “They carried the machetes either as a prop or something to use in that fantasy.

There is so much to amuse in this story, from the assailants politely leaving, the wrong client taking off his sleep apnea mask to talk to them, the correct client asking the assailants to take their machetes back to the car, and at the heart of the story – someone prepared to pay $5000 to have his underpants stroked with a broom.

You can read more here and here.